Tag Archives: paganism

God had a wife named Asherah

There’s a fun milestone beyond admitting God wasn’t the only “real god” when interpreting the bible. It turns out Yahweh from the bible (a.k.a “the God” to Christians) used to have at least one goddess as a wife.

“Asherah” (her name) even appears in the bible (40 times by my count); and is believed to be referenced when the bible mentions the “queen of heaven.” There is even archaeological evidence she and Yahweh were worshiped together in the same temples, to support the scriptures that say the same thing, so it’s not even speculation they were together anymore.

It required checking multiple sources and the bible, but I don’t have to be very skeptical anymore. I’ve nearly confirmed with certainty that:

1) “El” was a proto-god for Yahweh

2) El was definitely married to “Asherah”

3) El gradually merged with several other gods and inherited their properties, becoming the familiar composite god of “Yahweh;” therefore El should still be married to Asherah.
4) The scriptures had to be massively edited and reinterpreted as Jews gradually stopped believing there was more than one real god in the universe.

5) Yahweh was given multiple names of existing gods (Elohim, Jehova, YHWH). Meanwhile other gods had to be reinterpreted as Lucifer, demons or false idols, because they now believed there was only one god. And so, Asherah was turned into an enemy god around 7th century BCE, and then into a false god.

(What I still haven’t figured out are all the details of the mythology, but the gist is solid. Suddenly Yahweh has a love life to make my studying ancient desert religions more interesting if I want to come back from studying Shinto. Apparently El was a father god associated with the sky, while Asherah was an Earth goddess so it’s natural dualism.)

I wonder how many Christians have even heard that God was coupled with Asherah? I know Friedrich Nietzsche talked a bit about Asherah, so just how recent is this theory? How long until most Christians understand god was originally a polytheistic god?  I’m not even sure it is in my best interests to know how big the gap has grown between me and the knowledge of an average person.

(This drawing was copied from an 800 BC pottery fragment in Israel and the inscription when properly translated is a request for a blessing from “Yahweh and his Asherah.”) Yahweh is the dude on the left and Asherah is to the right.

 

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Shinto Absurdities

shinto temple

1. You are Izanami, the Japanese creator goddess. You died giving birth to the fire god, and your husband has come to the underworld to save you. You ask him not to look at you, while you talk to the gods of the underworld, but he accidentally does and sees your flesh has rotted. You want to come back to the land of the living, so how will you react?

A. Keep your cool. Finish talking to the gods of the underworld as you promised, and return to the land of the living with the man who loves you. Create lots of babies and islands, and have stories to tell with gods and humans. Shinto is all true, so there are definitely plenty of magical objects that can improve your looks or health.

B. Chase your husband through the underworld trying to murder him for peeping on you when you were vulnerable. Promise when he escapes to kill a thousand Japanese every day. Force your husband to cover Hades with a rock, permanently sealing you off from the land of the living. Make your husband into a widow and become his arch-enemy, and the enemy of everything you tried to create.

If you choose B, Shinto will make perfect sense to you.

Continue reading Shinto Absurdities

Shitpost: Cloud was the best philosopher

cloud.jpeg
Cloud and Zidane were the greatest philosophers that ever lived. They changed my life. But my best friends at middle school think Titus has even deeper insights into the human condition.

I discovered philosophy from Trigun. I could have stopped there and been smarter than the adults, but my older brother who is 14 and a genius showed me Final Fantasy. He has studied the story his whole life and wants to start a class to teach about Final Fantasy theology at a university. He says he needs to teach kids to live with nature again and care for gaia or ancient guardians will be awakened to destroy us.

 

This begs the question of what sort of religion Final Fantasy espoused?